It is time for a reset

I am very much looking forward to a long wanted, needed vacation. Since our move to Ottawa (actually since the moment I realized my life partner died) my dominant experience has been one of feeling “tired” -  embracing a new relationship with grief, a move, letting go, new beginnings and finding my way as a single parent - has all taken its toll. My mental and physical well being has been a priority, but often even those activities feel like another thing to do, another thing that takes up space on my calendar verses my desire to have more “white space”. 

It took almost a full year to get settled into our new home, to find our new daily rhythm, and for me to feel confident that my son has landed healthily and happily with all the change in his life.  I have shared with friends that only recently I feel that I am emerging from what felt like “survival mode” - shock, past conditioning, limiting beliefs, grief, fear all contributed to me holding on pretty tight to create a daily environment that would support and encourage my sons innocent spirit to continue to thrive. I think I have succeeded. 

Now it is time for me. 

It is time for a reset. 

Running on survival mode is exhausting. 

Focusing on what is missing is exhausting. 

Waiting for the other shoe to drop is exhausting. 

Wishing things were different is exhausting. 

Living with anxiety is exhausting. 

It is time for a reset.

Several months ago I wrote in my journal my “ideal personal retreat.”

Here is what flowed from my pen. 

• Alone time - I am in an interesting place; I feel a deep feeling of loneliness but also a desire to be alone. 
• White space - no agenda, no to do’s pulling at me, no decisions to be made. 
• Meaningful authentic conversations with like-minded individuals. 
• A healing, inspiring environment - by the ocean, a must!

I googled “personal retreats”.  It was divine how it came to be that I will be hoping on a plane on May 24th and going to Corfu Greece! Yes the beautiful island of Corfu!

I will be participating in an intimate writing retreat. In the mornings we will be guided to dig deep and write, the afternoons we are free to do as we please, and bonus! each evening if we choose, we will be escorted by a local and venture to the “Old Town”,  to experience the Greek cuisine and culture! (I am grateful that the universe was looking out for me and added in the fun part :). 

At this time in my life I am working on fully embracing a concept that I have shared with many clients over the years and that is to only say yes when it is a “big fat yes!”. 

In a scary, vulnerable kind of way this is a big fat yes.  I am deeply grateful. 

It is time for a reset. 

The reset started with a request from the retreat leader to send my bio to share with the other participants. I read my bio, it no longer resonated. 

After loss, life is different. 

After loss, I am different.

The reset begins...

In reviewing my life to date, It feels best to share my identity from a ‘then and now’ perspective - in order of priority I am a Mom, a daughter, a coach, a friend and a widow. My journey has taken me from being a highly achievement oriented focus to  https://www.teresia.com/blog/this-is-me

A special thanks to my good friends and long term colleagues Cheryl Cran and Candace Chaput in their support in the reflection of my new identity. 

Consider your next reset... a walk, how we start our mornings, or perhaps a weekend getaway, or a trip to another part of the world.